Hey, readers! Our 2019 con season is kicking off this weekend at FantaSci in Durham, NC!
Here’s a list of our panel appearances and fellow panelists:
COLLABORATING WITH AN AUTHOR
FRIDAY, March 22nd @ 3pm – Camellia
Writing by oneself is a journey, but collaborating with an author is a whole other kind of adventure! We’ll discuss the perks and challenges that come about when two heads come together (sometimes literally).
Panelists: Jacob & H.P. Holo, David Weber
SELF-PUBLISHING FOR SHY PEOPLE
FRIDAY, March 22nd @ 4pm – Camellia
For many aspiring authors, being an introvert is almost synonymous with being a writer…but unfortunately, that doesn’t sell books. We’ll discuss how to get the word out about your writing when all you want to do is hide behind your favorite notebook.
Panelists: H.P. Holo
CARE AND FEEDING OF AUTHORS
SATURDAY, March 23rd @ 11am – Camellia
The role that wives, significant others, family and friends have in caring for the writers that we love so that they can focus on creating the stories that we love.
Panelists: H.P. Holo and other author spouses
WRITING BY THE SEAT OF YOUR PANTS
SATURDAY, March 23rd @ 1pm – Rose
Pantsers unite! Some writers like to chart their story’s course and follow it to the letter. We are not those writers. We’ll discuss tips for writers who want to wander…without getting lost.
Panelists: H.P. Holo, Christopher Woods, Rob Howell, Terry Maggert, and Jason Graves
CHAOS OF CREATION: BALANCING WORLD BUILDING WITH STORY
SATURDAY, March 23rd @ 6pm – Rose
Sometimes you create a world so vast, you can’t possibly fit it all in a readable story. How, then, do you decide what to keep? We’ll discuss how to write a fascinating world while keeping readers engaged through plot and character.
Panelists: Jacob & H.P. Holo
JUMP, JIVE, and WRITE: A DISCUSSION OF MUSIC AS CREATIVE INSPIRATION
SUNDAY, March 24th @ 9am – Rose
The great philosopher, Plato, once said that “music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and life to everything.” Come hear a panel of authors discuss their musical influences growing up, as well as the songs, artists, and themes that drive their writing today.
Panelists: Jacob & H.P. Holo, Jason Cordova, Jason Graves, and Ian Malone
CRAFTING TIME TRAVEL RULESETS
SUNDAY, March 24th @ 11am – Magnolia (Main Room)
Time travel writing is fraught with paradoxes and endless potential for plot holes. We’ll discuss how to design a time travel system that doesn’t break your universe.
Panelists: Jacob Holo and Steve White
Schedule is subject to change so, check out the website or Facebook page for the most up-to-date info.
See you this weekend! 😀
Publishers Weekly on The Gordian Protocol!
Early reviews are beginning to roll in, and Publishers Weekly has good things to say about The Gordian Protocol, especially that:
“time travel enthusiasts will enjoy the moral dilemmas, nonstop action, and crisp writing.”
Not a bad start, if we say so ourselves! 😀
Read The Full Review Here!
Author Spotlight – Annie’s Bookstop of Worcester
The Gordian Protocol‘s release date is drawing ever-closer, and Annie’s Bookstop of Worcester’s shining an Author Spotlight on it, featuring an interview with David Weber and Jacob!
Visit their blog for the full interview to read some insights on how Jacob and David met, how The Gordian Protocol came to be, how they worked together, and more!
Read It Here!
The Gordian Protocol has a release date! Also, an eARC!
It’s been a long time coming, but The Gordian Protocol, Jacob’s collaboration with David Weber, finally has a release date!
Coming May 7, 2019 from Baen Books, The Gordian Protocol is a novel of bent timelines, alternate history, militarized time machines, exploding universes, and explosions in general.
(So basically, everything you’d expect of a Jacob Holo and David Weber novel.)
Naturally, it’s also available for preorder, so if you’d like to go ahead and jump on the time travel train, visit any of the retailers below (or your favorite local bookseller)!
Preorder Here:
Baen Books – Weber Universal Outfitters (SIGNED AND INSCRIBED COPIES) – Amazon – Barnes & Noble – Books-a-Million – IndieBound – Half Price Books
But perhaps best of all, you don’t even have to wait until May to read it, as the eARC is already available for download from Baen’s website!
What’s an eARC, you ask? An eARC is the next-to-final, un-copyedited version of the book. It may have a few minor formatting or typographical errors (which we and Baen are working to smooth out as you read this), but it’s essentially The Book – available early for those who just can’t wait to read it! 😀
Buy eARC Here:
As we near the release date, more updates will be forthcoming, so if you don’t want to miss out, be sure to join our mailing list!
Until then, enjoy this clean version of the cover art, illustrated by Dave Seeley:
Mary Poppins Returns – Movie Review
In Mary Poppins Returns, there’s a song titled “A Cover is not the Book.” It’s about various whimsical figures who are not what they seem on the surface, but it might as well be about the movie itself:
What looks to be an expensive, nostalgia-reliant cash grab is…well, still an expensive, nostalgia-reliant cash grab, but it’s also a delightful, deserving follow-up to a timeless classic.
In this sequel to 1964’s Mary Poppins, the Banks children are all grown up and facing grown-up problems—namely, the death of Michael’s wife, which has brought his sister Jane back into the fold of 17 Cherry Tree Lane to help take care of his three children, Annabel, John, and Georgie. A year without their mother has forced these children to grow up fast, but even the help they offer can’t stave off the most recent threat to their family—the potential loss of 17 Cherry Tree Lane and all the memories contained therein. Financially strapped, the only way the family can save their beloved home is to find the shares in Fidelity Fiduciary Bank that their father left to them, but in the disorganization of his grief, Michael has misplaced them. These are problems large enough to require the services of a magical nanny, and with all the foresight of such a nanny, Mary Poppins floats right in.
Mary Poppins Returns is a sequel that almost requires two viewings—one so you can roll your eyes at how often it leans on viewer memories of the original, a second so you can stop being a cynical modern moviegoer and fully enjoy how it not only pays homage to the original, but develops a complex theme all its own and does a practically perfect job of it. (Sorry not sorry.)
That said, the film definitely relies on the structure of the original, to the point where halfway through, I wondered if the film would have a single original plot point. The film opens with its own Bert, in this case a lamplighter named Jack, whose purpose is to carry on Bert Prime’s tradition of awful Cockney accents, introduce the audience to London, and remind everyone of how enigmatic and perfect Mary Poppins is. There’s the Making-a-Mundane-Task-Fun song (“Can You Imagine That?”), the Travel-to-a-Whimsical-Animated-World song (“The Royal Doulton Music Hall”), the jaunty “Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious” romp (“A Cover is Not the Book”), the Visit-to-the-Eccentric-Directionally-Challenged-Cousin song (“Turning Turtle”), the Song-and-Dance-with-Laborers (“Trip a Little Light Fantastic”), and the concluding Everything-is-Happy-and-Stuff-is-Flying song (“Nowhere to go But Up”). By the end, I was astonished that there wasn’t a Lullaby-About-Pigeon-Ladies (though there was a lullaby).
This said, it’s easy to write Mary Poppins Returns off as an unnecessary rip off of a classic. What keeps it from being so is how skillfully it handles its multitude of homages and how it builds upon elements introduced in the original to develop its own meaning.
This is a movie clearly made by fans of the original Mary Poppins. It’s obvious from the very opening song (“(Underneath the) Lovely London Sky”), to the painted-backdrop-and-overture credits to the unmistakably Sherman Brothers-inspired wordplay of the lyrics. (The soundtrack has been on repeat in my office and car since I first saw this movie.) Moreover, it fully understands the stern-yet-whimsical spirit of Mary Poppins as both a story and a character: the philosophy that sometimes even the dark, adult parts of life are best tempered with a little “stuff and nonsense.”
And that is even more key to this film than the last.
For though the movie is, on the surface, a nonsense storybook tale, it’s ultimately a story about grief—Michael coming to terms with the death of his wife (or not, as evidenced by the fact that he can’t run a functioning household without her, try as he might), and the children trying to do the same (but unable to because they have to take care of the household that their father can’t). Contrary to stereotype, when a nanny like Mary Poppins shows up, its because the adults need fixing, not the kids, and in this case, it’s two types of grown-up who need her help—one actual grown-up, three who have been forced to take on grown-up responsibilities tragically early in life.
Granted, the movie’s wildly lavish musical numbers often distract from that. Disney pulled out more stops than usual here, often to spectacular effect (“Trip a Little Light Fantastic” is a show-stopper), sometimes to CGI excess (“Can You Imagine That?” is a great song, but so conspicuously computer-generated that it barely feels like it belongs in the world of the movie). Still, ultimately the lyrics and themes of each individual song come together in a way that leads the Bankses to process their grief from a different perspective and, in effect, to reclaim the joys of innocence and happiness lost.
That this is accomplished through meaningful callbacks to the original Mary Poppins makes it that much better. Though several are admittedly pure window dressing for fans, many serve a relevant, indispensable purpose to the plot—namely the iconic kite from the “Let’s Go Fly a Kite” scene, which may as well have been a character in this film. Even references that don’t influence the plot are used in a charming, characterful way (Admiral Boom, Mr. Binnacle, and their punctual cannon make recurring appearances with a cute twist).
The cast performances are charming as well. With a character as distinct and iconic as Mary Poppins, the strength of the movie naturally rides on the depiction of said character, and Emily Blunt, from her precise language to her calculated slips of mischief, is spot-on in her role. Lin-Manuel Miranda, despite the accent, is as ebullient as the lamps his character lights. Ben Whislaw as Michael maintains a fine, likable balance between loving father and grieving husband, who comes across as emotionally incapacitated rather than completely incompetent, which is key for the appeal of his character (…even if the eventual reveal about the bank shares made the responsible adult in me want to scream at him). Despite not having a lot of screen time compared to the other characters, Emily Mortimer plays a sweet and assertive Jane, whose labor activism is a nice callback to the character’s suffragette mother. Finally, Pixie Davies, Nathaniel Saleh, and Joel Dawson as Annabel, John, and Georgie respectively also fill their roles well, balancing responsibility with playfulness and only coming across as precocious or whinging when children normally would.
The movie does have its flaws, but for me, most of them were nitpicks. There are moments when the film’s visuals become too overwhelming—as in the aforementioned “Can You Imagine That?” scene or in the animated “Royal Doulton Music Hall” sequence, where the backgrounds and costume design hearken back to the scratchy, sketchy Xerox era that produced Mary Poppins…but the animated animals all have clean, modern, digital lines. There’s also an actual antagonist in the form of William “Weatherall” Wilkins (Colin Firth), the new president of Fidelity Fiduciary Bank, who is determined to reclaim 17 Cherry Tree Lane for the very Hollywood reason of Profiting The Bank At All Costs. There’s a minor payoff for this conflict in the form of a fun character reveal at the end (Dick Van Dyke, revisiting a version of a role he played in the original), but in a story where the conflict is about characters overcoming personal problems, a concrete antagonist felt extraneous, and the entire climax could have worked even without the threat of Wilkins’ character. Fortunately, though, we don’t see enough of that character to really complain about, and the end itself is delightful enough to overshadow it.
The same can be said of the movie as a whole. The jaded adult in me might point out its flaws and repetitions, but the child in me delights in the way that it solves hard problems with childlike whimsy. While that seems like an unrealistic way to solve problems, hardships in my own life have taught me that often the best way to survive those periods (or at least ease oneself into a state where one is able to handle them) is to look at the darkness from a different, lighter perspective.
The wackiest song in the film, “Turning Turtle,” is actually the one that conveys the movie’s central message, and when Mary Poppins sings, “When you change the view from where you stood / The things you view will change for good,” it carries a deeper meaning far beyond her topsy-turvy situation. And, indeed, beyond the movie itself.
***
Note: Holo Writing is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program and, as such, may earn a small commission from any product purchased through an affiliate link on this blog.
SphinxCon 2018 Con Update!
Last weekend we hopped over to Atlanta, GA for the inaugural SphinxCon, a con run by The Royal Manticoran Navy, the Official Honor Harrington Fan Association. Given that said universe was created by Jacob’s esteemed co-author, David Weber, it was a perfect whirlwind of a weekend to spread the word about their upcoming collaboration, The Gordian Protocol (*more on that in a month or so, which is when we’ll officially be able to spill the beans. SO MANY BEANS).
We approached SphinxCon differently from cons we’ve attended in the past. Previously, we were tiny indie minnows in a huge author pond, swimming through Dealer’s Rooms and Artist’s Alleys just to get the word out about our books. Now that we’re slightly less tiny minnows (albeit swimming beside a whale of the sci-fi world), we moved into panels – and in doing so, met a slew of awesome new fans and fellow authors.
Being that The Gordian Protocol is a time travel adventure, Jacob naturally moderated a panel on Crafting Time Travel Rulesets, along with fellow writer William Alan Webb.
https://www.instagram.com/p/Bpz3maMF8KI/
That conversation continued even outside the panel, though. The engineer and physics nerd in Jacob had a riotous time crafting the rules for the world of The Gordian Protocol, going as far as to create a mathematical formula to predict the likelihood of certain time travel-induced changes in the world. (There are spreadsheets. LOTS of spreadsheets.)
https://www.instagram.com/p/Bpr1HY6hQVD/
H.P. moderated several panels, too, including Self-Publishing for Shy People with Jonathan Brazee and Michael J. Allen and Writing by the Seat of Your Pants with both them and Christopher Woods. Jacob joined her for Chaos of Creation: Balancing World Building With Story and then Jonathan Brazee and David Weber, of course, joined us for Collaborating with an Author.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BpvCXyulY02/
Some of the wildest panels, though, were those where we joined crowds of other authors for round table discussions of such topics as World Building (about…world building) and Science Fiction vs. Fantasy: Why not both? (about combining science fiction and fantasy in a single world). It was crazy to be able to sit on panels with such names as Chris Kennedy, Mark Wandrey, and David Gerrold (WRITER OF “THE TROUBLE WITH TRIBBLES,” YOU GUYS), in addition to those we’d already joined.
Of course, we can’t go without mentioning The Care and Feeding of Authors, wherein author spouses (H.P. here) chatted about what it takes to keep an author sane and fed, but mostly drank INCREDIBLE margaritas.
https://www.instagram.com/p/Bpz2JGGlcvn/
The panels were fun, but perhaps the best part of the convention was actually getting to hang out with fans. That’s something that doesn’t necessarily happen at larger cons or in hurried Dealer’s Rooms, but small cons like these provide the perfect opportunity to just chill in a hallway and discuss books and cats and food with people who, previously, we’d only communicated with on our Facebook fan page, if at all!
Best of all, we’re now even more pumped to continue our current writing projects – The Wizard’s Circus for H.P. and the SEQUEL to The Gordian Protocol for Jacob – until we come up for air again at the next con! 😀
We’re on YouTube! (Or, Q&A #1: “Who does your cover art?”)
Hey, fans! A while ago, we asked our readers on Facebook for their burning questions, and now, we’re proud to present 1) our new YouTube channel, and 2) the Q&A video series!
We kick it off with one of our most frequently asked questions:
Who does your cover art?
Check out the video below for introductions to each of our illustrators, and be sure to like and subscribe to our YouTube channel if you’d like to see more. Thanks for watching! 😀
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6hswk1W962I&w=560&h=315]
Introducing the Pug of War!
https://www.instagram.com/p/BSHI7gcBBcu/
Sometimes a piece of fanart comes along that digs into your brain and won’t let go.
Last year at SC ComiCon, Phouthong Phimmarath surprised us with this little beauty, plopping the beloved pug butler from The Wizards Way into a fierce suit of Crusader armor from The Dragons of Jupiter.
You’ll recognize Phouthong’s work if you’ve looked at the logos or squinted at the fleurons inside the print editions Seraphim Revival books. He’s already done fantastic art for us, and so it was an easy decision to commission a cleaned-up, graphical version of that initial brilliant sketch. He does a lot of sharp, graphical superhero art, too, so if you’d like to see more of this greatness, check out his art page.
Anyway, his Crusader Pug was a combination we never knew we needed, and the more we stared at it, the more we realized, we needed it on a shirt. And a poster. And a sticker. And a bookmark. And a mousepad. AND EVERYTHING. And quickly we realized that this little dude wasn’t just a doodle. He had mascot potential.
And so now we bring you the new face of Holo Writing:
The Pug of War
Sweet, snuggly, and loyal, there’s no pug you’d rather have by your side. Especially when threats like giant robots and alien bugs and evil wizards show up. When he can’t solve a problem with snuggles…well, that’s what the Gatling gun’s for. But snuggles are his preferred method of attack. I mean, just look at his squishy squish face! 😀 😀 😀
No one knows from whence he came or why, but he will be there when the world needs him.
On a related note, we’ll be bringing Pug of War swag with us to cons, but if we’re not coming to a con near you, never fear! That’s what our new loot shop is for!
Here you’ll be able to find shirts, posters, signed books, and other miscellaneous Holo Writing swag! We’re still waiting on a few more products to post before its ~ Official Launch ~ but until then, feel free to swing on by and check out some adorable, awesome stuff! 😀 😀 😀
Dog Aliens #1: Raffle’s Name – Book Review
I spotted Dog Aliens #1: Raffle’s Name by Cherise Kelley on a Book Barbarian promo, and with my love of all things animal and sci-fi, how could I turn it down?
In Dog Aliens, Clem is not a dog, but rather a Kaxian, an alien race that looks exactly like Earth dogs and is living on earth to mine for Jex. Jex is a mineral that humans don’t need but is intensely important to the Kaxian – and to the Niques, another race of dog aliens who will do anything in their power to stop the Kaxian from getting the Jex.
This sounds like a setup for an epic animal story via Erin Hunter’s Warriors or Kathryn Lasky’s Guardians of Ga’Hoole, but really it’s the tale of Clem as he goes on various little adventures, from finding a new family once he’s abandoned by his original owner, escaping from his new careless owner, trying to get adopted from a shelter, fending off pesky cats and Niques – and figuring out his strange new ability to influence minds by projecting “mind movies” onto them.
The story lacks direction because of this episodic structure, but I doubt this will matter for its target audience, which is young middle schoolers and people who just love to read about dogs. For those readers, it’s fun to see earthly dog habits explained in Kaxian terms: Dogs dig all the time because they’re mining for Jex; they eat Jex to carry it, poop it to deliver it, and eat it again to carry it further if needs be. Not all of the content has earth dog parallels, though: Kaxians, for example, have multiple lives (as cats are reputed to, not dogs), and the book never establishes why exactly Jex is so important.
This may detract from the enjoyment of picky readers (Personally, I wanted more details about nearly all nontraditional elements of the story). Others who are looking for a quick, clean read, though, will enjoy it. The book is clear from the beginning that it’s a gentle read, with page one clearly stating that no dogs die, and in general it’s pretty tame, though there is one scene where a bad owner threatens to hit a dog with a frying pan and another wherein a dog in a shelter hopes that it won’t send him to his next life (i.e. implying he’s in a kill shelter).
Ultimately, it’s a quick, fun read for fans of talking animal adventures.
***
Note: Holo Writing is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program and, as such, may earn a small commission from any product purchased through an affiliate link on this blog.
EXCITING NEWS involving Jacob, David Weber, and a NEW BOOK!
I have a funny Liberty Con story: My fellow authors and I were gathering for our Sunday panel last summer, proudly displaying our books so everyone could see what we’d written. Suddenly the author next to me sees The Wizard’s Way. His eyes go wide and starry (I may have imagined this) and he asks, “You wrote a book with Jacob Holo? Is that the same Jacob Holo that’s writing a book with David Weber?”
So now I am mildly famous by association by association, which is funny. But not actually the point of this story.
The point of this story is that Jacob indeed WROTE A NOVEL WITH DAVID FREAKING DADDY OF HONOR HARRINGTON, CREATOR OF SAFEHOLD WEBER.
ACTUAL PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE:
https://www.instagram.com/p/BhFzPU6lj3P/
By this point, it would be more correct to say that David and Jacob just signed a contract for the novel with Baen Books and are working on the final draft, so it will be happening later rather than sooner.
Until then, I imagine you probably want to know more about this mysterious book.
Once upon a time, Jacob told me he’d never write a time travel novel. Well, when David Weber asks you if you want to write a time travel novel with him, you change your mind. Unfortunately, we can’t reveal more than that until closer to the release, but rest assured, it’s a novel in which lots of things explode because, hello, look at the authors.
We don’t have a projected release date yet, but a perfect way to keep up with the book’s progress is to join our mailing list. More news of this exciting project will reach you as soon as we have it!
***
Note: Holo Writing is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program and, as such, may earn a small commission from any product purchased through an affiliate link on this blog.
Everything I Am I Owe to Bad Movies
The #1 question readers ask authors is “What inspires you to write?” Many authors have deep answers like “intellectual curiosity” or “the ability to create my own reality,” but mine’s nothing of the sort.
My greatest inspiration is bad movies.
I enjoy good entertainment, too, of course, but looking back on my life as a writer, I realize that my emergent interest in writing coincided with my discovery of several not-so-classic bits of media, and once my interest in writing was established, similar media propelled my writing interests forward.
Good movies inspired me, too, but the thing about good movies is that they tend to be, for the most part, complete. They’ll always have some flaws, but generally their worlds will be refined, their plots will come together nicely, or you at least leave them satisfied with the adventure you just took while watching.
This isn’t the case with bad movies. Bad movies are defined by their flaws, whether it’s terrible acting, slapdash worldbuilding, lazy characterization, or plot holes galore – but some of these movies have just enough good in them to snag the viewer’s attention, and that is where my interests caught.
When I was starting out as a writer, I didn’t see “plot holes.” I saw “parts of the story that the movie didn’t have time to flesh out.” I made up my own explanations. These explanations became fanfiction. Soon after writing a few early fanfics I realized I could overlap ideas to create my own worlds, and the more bad movies I watched, the more plot holes I explored, and the more ideas I had.
The flaws in bad movies, then, became a playground for my imagination.
Because of that, even when sitting in a crowded theatre, I’m never watching the same movie as everyone else. Terrible movies continue to drive my writing to this day.
But without these initial gems (rocks? gravel?), I’d never have become a writer. To that effect, here are the terrible pieces of entertainment to which I owe the formation of my entire creative being.
Samurai Pizza Cats
Technically it’s not a movie, but it’s pivotal, so we have to start here.
Only the most awesome 0.001% of the Internet has even heard of this show, and it’s probably made up of people from the other percentages who love mediocre animation, the most eye-rolling of dad jokes, and who grew up watching this mess during its brief appearance on ‘90s TV.
Samurai Pizza Cats is a show set in Little Tokyo, where the population is anthropomorphic animals who are also sometimes robots and the main characters are pizza delivery cats by day, sentai by night or whenever the Big Cheese (He’s a big mouse) and his lackey ninja crows (The leader is named Bad Bird) get up to mischief.
It’s one of those anime where the translators saw the original Japanese script, went “PBBBT!” and decided to just write whatever came to mind, no matter how outdated or cringingly awful the humor was. It’s why we have the Big Cheese (who was a fox in the original Japanese), as well as an old crow named Jerry Atric and a dog named Al Dente (for no particular reason except that it was a pun). The very theme song sounds like the performer got himself drunk and just sang the first pizza-related puns to come to mind while inexplicably channeling the B-52s.
And O LORT did 4th Grade me devour it.
My first pieces of real writing were, no lie, Samurai Pizza Cats fanfic. I even attempted to write a musical at some point but stopped because, even in my ill-advised elementary school days, I knew the world did not deserve an atrocity of that scale. (Also I have no idea how to write music.)
Soon after that, Warner Brothers released Cats Don’t Dance – which is a fantastic movie and thus has no place on this list, but kicked my cat-based writing fling into a full-on hobby. For the next several years, I spent all of recess and free time exploring my fictional world of my Wild Cats – a bunch of anthropomorphic cats who…well, actually I can’t remember what they did because high school me burned all the old manuscripts out of embarrassment. But I bet it was incredible.
And that interest still sticks with me today, albeit in a different form. Although I’m far from a furry, I do enjoy writing talking animal characters and building complex cultures around them – something that surfaces quite prominently in the dogmen and Brunl (bear) cultures in The Wizard’s Way (and is explored in even more depth in the upcoming The Wizard’s Circus).
Quest for Camelot
If Samurai Pizza Cats was my gateway drug to writing, Quest for Camelot was the bag of [insert drug of choice here] in which I planted my face, heart, and soul, and let’s face it, never really came up for air.
Quest for Camelot is a miracle of a movie in that it has an A-List cast (including Cary Elwes and Gary Oldman); top tier musicians of its time (Celine Dion and Andrea Frickin’ Bocelli); and came from Warner Animation in between two of the greatest modern animated films (The Iron Giant and Cats Don’t Dance)…and yet somehow ended up one of the worst big budget animated films ever made.
The Nostalgia Critic has already covered everything that makes it terrible, and Jacob could barely make it through that. It is literally so terrible that Jacob has promised to watch it with me only as a landmark anniversary present.
I came upon Quest for Camelot in a roundabout way, finding the movie novelization on my 5th Grade English teacher’s shelf and picking it up because I’d read anything that had to do with Arthurian legends. Though the book was a pretty standard medieval fantasy – Tomboyish girl who wants to become a knight goes on a quest to save Excalibur – it had many details that snagged my attention more so than other fantasies I was reading at the time. First, one of the main characters is blind and yet, despite this seeming flaw, an essential and active contributor to the protagonist’s quest. Second, he has a falcon companion, which is just badass. And third, its heroine was a female adventurer, and in a lot of the books I was reading at the time, this wasn’t the case. All this to say, I was a hardcore Quest for Camelot fan before my parents even took me to see the movie. After the movie, I was 3000% a fan and writing tons of fantasy inspired by its world.
Which is why I was bewildered when I watched it again as an adult and realized that it is, in fact, a dumpster fire of a movie. XD I vividly remember being excited to show it to my cool college friends…who not even halfway through went WHAT IS THIS HP I CAN’T EVEN. This in the days before it was fashionable for millennials to lack the ability to EVEN. This from a crowd that had regular Mystery Science Theatre 3000 movie nights. It’s that bad.
Warner Brothers tried SO HARD with this movie, but at some point, all their grand plans went to hell and gave us okay-hand-drawn-animation-to-atrocious-CG-animation, a sense of humor that doesn’t know if it wants to stay in its world or go full Looney Tunes (There are ACME references), and a plot that craps on every single bit of potential presented by its Arthurian world. King Arthur is only in the movie long enough to be voiced by a James Bond actor pretending to be Sean Connery (perhaps a First Knight reference, but let the complexity of that irony sink in), before his arm is broken when a griffin snaps Excalibur off the back of his seat – not even in a battle, not even out of his hands. He tells his peeps to find Merlin and go after Excalibur, at which point Merlin’s like “Hm, I’m just gonna send this falcon to protect the sword. He’s got this.” And so it’s up to Kayley, the aforementioned tomboy farm girl, and Garrett, the aforementioned blind dude, to save the sword. Because everyone more qualified – like, I don’t know, actual knights – is too indisposed by, I don’t know, listening to King Arthur’s terrible accent. Or maybe hypnotized by bad guy Ruber’s eyebrows.
(For real, I am pretty sure his eyebrows had their own animator.)
(And maybe he had his own choreographer for this jam.)
(Ok, for real, I’m done now.)
I could go on about the obvious villain, his nonsensically complicated plot to take over Camelot, the fact that he uses a magic (ACME!) potion to turn his underlings into half-weapon people as if maces for hands are somehow more practical than, I don’t know, hands for hands. Not to mention the one rooster he turns into a half-axe like really, dude, what’s a rooster going to do with an axe face?
Even so, 5th graders don’t think about those kinds of things when they watch movies, so Quest for Camelot snatched my interest away from talking cats and poured it all into medieval adventures. Most of my stories through junior high were medieval fantasies featuring kick-butt girl protagonists, falcons and hot blind hermits, and again, some of those elements surface in The Wizard’s Way. Chaucey’s pal Ellid totally has a sassy griffin companion because of Ruber’s griffin minion, and the medieval aesthetic that pops up in certain areas of Aurica (the Queen’s Guard wearing ceremonial armor, for example) is a definite holdover from my medieval fantasy days.
Atlantis: The Lost Empire
https://youtu.be/D_1yq1xJ3QA
[Insert sound of all steampunkers clutching their pearls]
Admittedly, it pains me to consider Atlantis a bad movie, given the place it holds in the hearts of dual Disney and steampunk fans (myself included), and given that we rarely get animated steampunk movies at all, much less ones that are that pretty.
When it comes down to it, however, Atlantis is a film fraught with flaws. Much of this seems due to the fact that it changed identities halfway through production, which never seems to end well for movies. (Apparently it was going to be a monster movie in an early stage, before it became more focused on the city of Atlantis itself.) Even so, a change in focus is no excuse for the undeveloped characters, predictable plot twists, and convenient-for-the-moment plot details that don’t make any sense in a larger context. (Like, how can the Atlanteans speak modern languages without having been exposed to the development of those languages, and why do they know all those languages BUT NOT REMEMBER HOW TO READ THEIR OWN NATIVE LANGUAGE. 😐 Why entrust the health of an entire expedition to a cook who doesn’t understand the four basic food groups? How on earth could a 16-year-old be the most experienced mechanic Whitmore could find?)
The logic of the movie’s world-building is terrible.
However – and it’s a big HOWEVER – its individual pieces had the makings of something great, and this is why Atlantis still holds onto its place in my heart with giant crabby Leviathan claws.
Much as with Quest for Camelot, the details that grabbed me with Atlantis were the ones I wasn’t seeing in other stories at the time. The hero of the movie is not a conventional adventurer, but a weedy little linguist of all things.
Its princess was not a porcelain doll trapped in a castle, but a warrior (uncommon in animated films at the time) who was more concerned with helping her people than being the hero’s girl (though the end of the movie suggests they ended up together). Really, all of its women were quite capable on their own.
Most notable for me was its effortlessly diverse cast, all characterized with little nuggets of backstory that made them just interesting enough…but then, disappointingly, didn’t develop any of that. Atlantis could have approached being a masterpiece if it had dedicated just a little more meaningful screen time to Audrey, Sweet, Moliere, and Vinny (and solved its world-building problems).
But I guess that’s what fanfiction’s for. Likewise, because of those flaws, my imagination ran wild to fill in the gaps, or at the very least play with the movie’s ideas. One of my heroes in an as-yet-unfinished novel was a linguist (albeit a buff linguist who goes on an intergalactic adventure), and again, echoes of Atlantis permeate The Wizard’s Way. Atlantis was the movie that made me want to write a steampunk novel; Chaucey’s last name is Thatcher as a reference to Milo Thatch (Thatcher being an early-production name); the magic mineral clarien is blue because of Atlantis’ magic crystals (though the magic works quite differently); and the central characters are diverse, well, mainly because the real world is diverse, but also because Atlantis planted in my head a notably diverse cast with whom I wanted to spend more time.
This is just the tip of the iceberg. There are plenty of other awful entertainments that drove my writing. Perhaps one day I’ll write about my Digimon/Titan A.E.-inspired world from junior high, or my Monster Rancher/Mystic Knights of Tir Na Nog saga. (Hey, there were a lot of monster shows back then.)
Until then, readers, what are your guilty pleasure movies/TV shows? 😀
***
Note: Holo Writing is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program and, as such, may earn a small commission from any product purchased through an affiliate link on this blog.
What to Read While You Wait for The Wizard’s Circus (or, a Gift Guide for Steampunk/Wizard/Magic Nerds)
Hey, wizard fans! It’s been a while since you’ve heard from me about The Wizard’s Circus, but rest assured, it’s still on its way! The first draft is over halfway finished, with plenty of bears and Pentalion (and if you have no idea what any of that means, find out in Book One, The Wizard’s Way).
In the meantime, here are some reads for you to check out while you wait! These are all books that have influenced my writing of The Wizard’s Quartet series thus far – or, in a few cases, books that spurred me along when I needed that extra touch of inspiration.
The Color of Magic by Terry Pratchett
Okay, first of all, if you’ve never read any Terry Pratchett, you need to drop everything right now, take a few weeks off, and delve into the brilliant fantasy comedy satire that is the Discworld series (and then check out all the BBC miniseries, too, because they’re legit).
The Color of Magic is the first in the series and follows the hapless wizard Rincewind and tourist Twoflower as they go on adventures and get into trouble involving everything from dragons to Death himself to a sentient luggage with feet.
The amazing thing about Terry Pratchett is that he wrote better books while suffering from Alzheimer’s than most people can with a fully functioning brain. You can’t go wrong with any book from the Discworld series, but if you’d like a little direction, some of my other favorites include Interesting Times, Hogfather, The Wee Free Men, Going Postal, Making Money, Monstrous Regiment, and Thud!
Etiquette & Espionage by Gail Carriger
This was the first of Gail Carriger’s books that I read, and I’ve solidly gone from skimming the ARC to wholeheartedly recommending everything else I’ve read of hers (which, at this point, is Curtsies & Conspiracies, Waistcoats & Weaponry, and her two adult series starters, Soulless and Prudence). Gail Carriger is my go-to author when I need some steampunk writing inspiration; her works are a perfect blend of steampunk comedy, magical technology, and Victorian prissiness. Etiquette & Espionage in particular is a fun girl-spy-in-training-on-a-floating-airship-school novel, with an engaging cast of characters and also a hot werewolf and a robotic weiner dog named Bumbersnoot. If you’re into audiobooks, Moira Quirk’s readings of The Finishing School Series are also fantastic.
View from the Imperium by Jody Lynn Nye
JEEVES AND WOOSTER IN SPACE, Y’ALL. That is all.
The Jeeves and Wooster series by P.G. Wodehouse
All right, I can’t mention Jeeves and Wooster without mentioning the actual Jeeves and Wooster books. Pentalion and Chaucey were loosely written to be a steampunked version of the two wherein Jeeves was a swordfighting pug and Wooster was less of an imbecile. (Oh sure, Chaucey still gets himself into trouble, but it has more to do with his being a precocious teenager with some truly wild issues, as opposed to someone who’s just basically dumb.)
Admittedly, the A&E TV series starring Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie as the title characters influenced The Wizard’s Quartet more so than P. G. Wodehouse’s original books (primarily because I’d marathoned the whole series before I even touched the books), but the books naturally hold as much charm as the series. When I needed some extra inspiration (for Pentalion in particular) I’d pick up any book in the Jeeves and Wooster series.
Mortal Engines by Philip Reeve
I could write a whole blog post devoted to Philip Reeve and his fantasy worlds. In fact, I’ve already reviewed Mortal Engines in more detail and a review of Larklight (mentioned below) is forthcoming. Aside from Gail Carriger, Philip Reeve is easily my favorite steampunk author because his worlds are so delightfully imaginative and so effortlessly steampunk. As much as I love it, I find that a lot of steampunk reads like it’s trying so hard to be steampunk, bless its heart. Reeve’s work doesn’t feel like it’s trying at all; it feels like he put pen to paper and magic just happened because some divine being thought readers needed some good in this world. Mortal Engines’ good, in particular, is a tale of traveling cities that eat other cities, amongst plenty of moral dilemmas.
Larklight by Philip Reeve
Where Mortal Engines explores the dark post-apocalyptic underbelly of a steampunk world, Larklight takes readers in the exact opposite direction – into outer space, where pirates and lizard people and giant robot spiders in bowler hats await. Readers who love the whimsical side of steampunk will have a hard time finding a better book.
Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfer
Artemis Fowl was one of those pivotal series that I read before I even knew I wanted to write, and that worked its way into my writing style like a force all its own. I owe my current approach to fantasy humor to Terry Pratchett, but Eoin Colfer was the first to show me the possibilities of magical action comedy and even fantasy linguistics. The series-titled first book is a clever, sassy, devious thing that combines young criminal geniuses with magic, fictional languages, and wonderful puns. (Turns out that the word “leprechaun” is just a misunderstanding of “LepRECON,” which is an organization of militarized magical folk.) The second book, The Arctic Incident, takes these basics and then ramps up into a full-on action-adventure story, and the series only spirals into more exciting mayhem from there.
Airman by Eoin Colfer
If you like reading about Chaucey because he’s building a flying machine, here’s a book for you. Historical adventure that is far more adventure than history*, it follows young inventor Conor Broekhart as he goes from being born in the midst of a hot air balloon crash, to building one of the first powered flying machines, to being framed for a crime he didn’t commit…and all the rollicking mayhem that ensues. It’s a fun, fast-paced read that often gets lost amidst Colfer’s avalanche of other work and guided the writing of The Wizard’s Way’s many flight scenes.
*I was disappointed after reading to find that the history of the Saltee Islands was completely made up for the story, so this book is to historical fiction as Indiana Jones is to archaeology.
The Raven Cycle series by Maggie Stiefvater
I discovered this series too late for it to actually shape the world of The Wizard’s Quartet, and truly, it doesn’t have much in common with the series other than magic. When it comes to editing rough drafts, though, the audiobook adaptations of this series were my go-to inspiration material. Maggie Stiefvater has a majestic way with words, and Will Patton’s reading imbues each character with unique life.
Paranormal urban fantasy isn’t usually my cup of tea, but this series not only made me like this tea, but savor it.
Delilah Dirk and the Turkish Lieutenant by Tony Cliff
Swordfighting? Check. Globetrotting? Check. Flying ships? Check. A lady adventurer who escapes from dungeons and fights tigers and robs a pirate’s treasure like it ain’t no thang? Check. A Turkish lieutenant…er…inadvertent traitor who just wants to survive it all and drink some tea? Check.
I returned to this book again and again when I needed some inspiration for The Wizard’s Way because, even though it’s not about steampunk magic or pug butlers, it hits all of the stylistic notes that I wanted the novel to hit – namely its sense of high-stakes derring-do and effortless wit. Its sequel, Delilah Dirk and the King’s Shilling, expands nicely upon the first, and a third, Delilah Dirk and the Pillars of Hercules, is forthcoming (and eagerly awaited on my part!).
Love, Lies, and Hocus Pocus series by Lydia Sherrer
I literally finished the first book in this series a month before writing this entry, but I can solidly say that fans of The Wizard’s Way will find everything to love in these books. There are wizards, witches, plenty of sass, two wonderfully complex and well-designed magic systems, and (in later entries) a talking cat.
Akata Witch by Nnedi Okorafor
I’ve spread the gospel of this one, too, and put off reading the last chapter of its sequel forever just because I don’t want it to be over. Akata Witch isn’t steampunk, nor does it feature talking animals – but it is the standard to which I hold my fantasy worldbuilding. In Leopard Knocks and its magical Leopard People, Okorafor has created a truly original magic society, albeit one with strong echoes of the familiar (There are a lot of surface similarities to Harry Potter, even though they’re spiritually different). Anytime I’m bummed about writing and need some inspiration, I come back to Nnedi Okorafor’s books.
The Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling
What? I’m a millennial. For me, every wizard thing goes back to Harry Potter, and in its earliest stage, The Wizard’s Way literally goes back to me saying, “I want to write a story about a wizard, but I want wizardry to make his life suck so it’s different from Harry Potter.” (Sorry, Chaucey.) 😛
That’s all for now! Readers, what books have been getting you through the wait for The Wizard’s Circus? 😀
***
Note: Holo Writing is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program and, as such, may earn a small commission from any product purchased through an affiliate link on this blog.